If Jesus had twelve close friends but never a Best Friend, then why do we think we need one?
At this point in our lives I think we can all agree that we've had varying styles of friendships. From the friend that would meet you on the elementary school playground when you were young to the friends that you would share your deepest secrets with when you matured. The friend that you wave to as you pass by the parent pick-up line at school, but never hang out with, and the friend that you cry on the phone with when you're having a marriage crisis.
All of those friends, we've allowed into our lives at different levels according to the level of the friendship. The closer the friend has been to us they have probably been labeled what we call a Best Friend.
...should that be our friendship goal? (My teenage daughters would say it this way, #friendshipgoals) To be someone's Best Friend and for them to be ours? Is that truly how we are meant to live?
Often, when you are someone's Best Friend and you are theirs, it becomes an "exclusive" relationship. Other friends look from the outside of that friendship and feel that there is a barrier that shouldn't be crossed. Missed opportunities to get to know other friends fall by the wayside.
*This very thing happened to me about ten years ago. I had a Best Friend and we hung out all the time. What I didn't realize at that time was that I was spending so much time and energy with her, that I was missing out on deeper friendships with the other women in my life. I hadn't realized this until my friendship with my Best Friend had fallen apart. My now close friend revealed to me that when I was Best Friends with ...let's just call her "Lynn".... she didn't try to pursue a closer friendship with me because she thought my Best Friend would have been jealous.
Another example of the exclusion factor is when another, now close friend of mine, told me later on that she didn't want to get to know me because she assumed that because I was Best Friends with "Lynn", that I must be just like her and since she didn't like my Best Friend, she assumed that she wouldn't like me.
The #1 Lie About Friendships is that you need to have a Best Friend.
There's a lot of people living life, missing out on deeper relationships with others because of the use of this label.
Look up, look around, expand your vision, expand your capacity for friendships and you just might be surprised who'll you'll meet out there!